In cafes around Sydney town at certain times of day
There are people who are not at work but clearly not at play
and some are tapping laptop keys while some handwriting notes
and some they trade ideas while others trade in cars and boats

Now some are our creatives who are scripting up a show
and waiting on production types to call and tell them “ Go”
and some work lists and some work notes and some work up a plan
but the one thing that they cannot cop is working for the man

They don't hang out for Friday night, there's no shape to their week
They don't set their alarm clocks and don't travel in the peak
While some go at an easy pace there's some are pure machine
and some they only leave the house to get to the caffeine.

Now mostly it is eyes ahead and focus on the task
but impossible it isn't for the table next to ask:
“ I notice that you're not at work what is it that you do
that allows you to be in this joint on flat white number two?

Have you just taken sick leave, or what's called an RDO
Are you caught between engagements but will soon be on the go
Or are you young lady, idle, and inheriting great wealth?”
“ I tell you sir its none of those, I'm scheduling my self

I'm all done through with conference calls and setting common goals
In preference over power-point I'd gladly walk hot coals
In terms of moods and phobia there's nothing makes me blue
like the thought of work assessment and the six-monthly review

Relationships with clients? I have had them up to here
who could have thought that work could take the fun out of free beer
I made it out some years ago , I can no longer face
The thought that walls and floors and lifts define my working space

I'm never going back in to a corner office cell
I won't refrain from saying that I'd rather go to hell
If you can understand that, if the mere thought makes you shout
Then its good that we've crossed paths now and we prob'ly should hang out”

Andrew Coorey has cobbled together a few small or half businesses in order to avoid an adult workplace. These include Sydney's Best Trivia, Live Band Karaoke and many event presentation gigs which come his way in sport, music and other fields. His last tie-wearing office job was with Macquarie Bank in 1997. He lives in Sydney.