Insight Into Living Blind

Daniel Taverne

I’m legally blind, so when I began this article, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say about blindness since conveying a true sense of the condition to the seeing is virtually impossible.

I then began to think of ways to describe what blind people see, and what totally blind people do not.   But even with good illustrations, it would be difficult for those with sight to understand the permanence and unyielding challenges conquered by people like me on a regular basis. That said, I concluded that I could only hope to spread a sense of understanding to the seeing by documenting those experiences with which I am all too familiar in my day to day life. Maybe after reading this, you’ll feel a little more respect, and a little more patience when encountering us out in the world.

First of all, I’m not completely blind.  I say this because I know I have some advantages that totally blind people do not.  For instance, even though I can’t see the character’s faces on the TV, I can watch programs if I sit very close to the screen. Totally blind people, however, can’t see it at all.  My ability to watch TV this way, still presents its own unique set of challenges though, one of which is not being able to find the remote control.

One afternoon a few weeks ago, I decided to sit down and watch TV, so I began looking for the remote.  I started by looking on the breakfast bar- didn’t see it.   Then I looked on the kitchen counters, then the couch and love seat.  Unfortunately, ten minutes later, I was still looking when my teenage daughter entered the room.  Unbelievably, she walked directly to the breakfast bar, and retrieved the remote that had been sitting there in plain sight the entire time.   This whole frustrating scenario was topped off when she turned on the TV, and started watching Sponge Bob!

Another issue is that I don’t always see the two cats that live with me and who are consequently always on high alert as to where I am walking.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve flattened Fluffy, or sideswiped Snow Flake while rushing to the bathroom, or while sneaking to the fridge for a midnight snack.  It’s no wonder that after watching their nine lives dwindle down to two or three, they now make a wide arc around me when I’m up and about.

Interesting observations can be made if you watch a visually impaired person trying to find a particular food item in a large grocery store. Let me tell you, after asking an individual for help one day, I’ve learned there are a great many helpful people out there for us to contend with.   You see, after explaining to a fellow shopper that I am legally blind, I asked her if she could tell me where the clam sauce was located.    Well, I didn’t notice that there was someone else nearby who also heard everything I said, and so you can understand why I was completely surprised when another shopper quickly grabbed me by the arm saying, “Don’t worry baby, I’ll show you.”    And what happened next? The lady I actually asked suddenly became disgruntled, and grabbed my other arm saying through clenched teeth, “He asked me first!”  Painfully, for about two minutes, the women yanked me this way and that, until the manager observed me being nearly pulled limb from limb, and thankfully intervened to save my life.

The next challenge people like me have that seeing people should know about is the difficulty we have buying gifts for our spouses without them finding out what they are and ruining the surprise.  The main reason for this is that it’s usually because it’s our spouses who have to take us to the store.  Recently, I went to a large department store with my wife.  I told her to “Go away!” so I could shop for her gift.  After asking at least a dozen strangers throughout my ordeal what various price tags read, and what kinds of things were in various bath sets, I finally found her something. 

What I bought for her, however, was so big that I was soon worried she’d see it as I was carrying it to the register, or out the door.  Once outside, it took twenty-five minutes of walking up and down rows of parked cars to find our vehicle.

And let me tell you, gifts need cards, and if you are visually impaired and looking for a card for your husband or wife, you better get someone to read them to you before you choose the one you want.   Last June, I was too self-conscious to ask somebody in the store to read the cards I was looking through for my wife’s 35th birthday.   So, looking at the pictures as best I could, I finally thought I’d bought a card that said, “I love you, and always will.”  But, in actuality, what the card really said was, “I love you even though you’re over the hill.”
Needless to say, my wife wasn’t pleased when she finally got around to reading her card.

Another challenge for the visually impaired comes from having helpful adaptive devices that talk, but that do not have volume controls.  In other words, everyone in the house now knows when I am ‘seeing’ what time it is, and when I am weighing myself.   Why does this bother me? Well think about it, if you are a married man, and your wife is taking forever getting ready to go out to dinner, each time you glance down at your watch, loudly blurt out what time it is.  Keep this up, and I can assure you it won’t take long for you to find out how wives react to feeling rushed. Those husbands who can quietly and discreetly check their watches with neither reproach, nor loud voices blurting out the time (agitating their wives) have no idea just how lucky they are.

The other device I’d like a volume control on is my talking scale.  As it stands right now, it is both a marvel of modern technology, and a thorn in my side.  The problem I have with it is every time I stand on it I hear my wife yell from the kitchen, “You ain't losing any weight yet.” Annoyed, I respond with, “Thanks for the info honey, but I’m blind, not deaf.”

To sum this all up, the visually impaired have many challenges they face on a regular basis.  From awkward and benign situations at home, to more serious predicaments like having to cross busy streets or navigate large hospitals, most visually impaired people handle these obstacles with grit and determination.  That said, you might come across a visually impaired person one day who is in your way, or causes you grief or delay in some other manner. If you do, remember this article and remember how pervasive the effects of vision loss are in the life of the impaired, and maybe you will indeed feel a little more understanding, patience and respect.

Copyright Daniel Taverne 2006
Daniel Taverne is a Disabled Veteran living in Louisiana. He is married and has a stepdaughter. You can view his blog at http://dtaverne.blogspot.com

 

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